In no way do I expect anybody to actually read this...

This should be a chapter book.

I know I haven't posted for two weeks. I'm sorry, but don't worry, I more than make up for that here. In fact, it might take you two weeks just to read this...

SO much happened this last week I barely know where to begin. You, my dear reader, can begin by quickly skimming through the following pictures and feeling satisfied that you have gotten a basic idea of our terrific trip. I however, will be doing no such skimming, because I plan on writing a very long, very detailed description of this week, with several random stories thrown in just for good measure. Matt and I print our blog off at the end of each year and bind it into a book, so when I look back at this page I would like to remember exactly what happened, who we were with, and where we were for each event. Also, because Matt has Internet access he will be checking this to see pictures of us and what we've been up to since he's been away. (It was SO FUN, Mattie!)

So you start skimming, and I'll start writing...and writing...and writing...

The beginning of this week was spent in Rexburg with my immediate family and most of my friends from high school, so I basically got to relive my childhood. My mom and dad were more than willing to take Bennett for me while I went to sleepovers, played night games, stayed up all night talking, etc. And while I kind of felt like a slacker mom, I knew that Grandma and Grandpa quality time was necessary. So I gave it to them. I have to admit, at times I really missed Bennett...and at times I forgot I even had a kid in the first place. It was a very weird place to be, but I enjoyed every minute of it! I am the luckiest girl on the planet.

Sunday night, me and my bestest friends Heather and Amanda went to visit my other bestest friend Alie in the hospital, where she was visiting her baby boy Rockwell in the NICU. He was born about a month early, and while everything was fine, he hadn't developed the ability to suck yet so the hospital wouldn't release him for a few weeks.

Alie, me, Heather, and Amanda in the NICU hallway. It was really good to get to see Alie and her husband Troy with their new little boy. They are fantastic parents.

Alie and Rockwell. Rockwell actually got to go home just a day or two after this picture was taken. I visited them later in their home and got to see his adorable argyle nursery. I swear, some people are just too creative. Congratulations, Alie and Troy!

One of the things I miss most about Rexburg is that All-American, small-town feeling. Monday was flag day, so the scouts and my dad (who is the scout leader) went around to all the houses in our ward aka: neighborhood, and put up American flags on the front lawns. Actually, every scout troop in Rexburg put up flags in every ward member's front yard, which meant that basically every front yard in the entire city had a matching flag in it. It just makes me happy. And proud. And apparently a little nostalgic.

"Oh say, can you see?"

I also hit up a couple of really good lemonade stands while I was here. There is an unbreakable rule in my family that you never pass a lemonade stand without stopping. I think all the spare change in the car cup holders was used up in an area of about three blocks on one particularly hot day (and by "hot" I mean mid 70's). There are some real entrepreneurs in this little town.

Monday night I went to my friend Heather's house, where me, her, Amanda, and my other bestest friend Dyan, stayed up all night having a sleepover. I can honestly say this was the first time in my life I have not closed my eyes for even a second (blinking not counted) from one day to the next. If you know me, you know I really, really enjoy my sleep time. But I have been so blessed with the kind of friends that know me inside and out, and love me no matter what I do or where I go. And even though we are all engaged or married, and most of us are moms to one or more child, and our lives are crazy with planning weddings (Dyan) and moving to other states (Amanda), or if we haven't even talked on the phone for like, six months, (Heather, haha!) we all make time for each other and it is exactly the same as if we were seventeen, sleeping out on my trampoline in the backyard, talking about the latest drama in our lives.

It takes some pretty great friends to do that, and I am so lucky to have had them for the past ten years and for the next...well, I really don't see an end here. :)

Amanda, me, and Heather, looking really scary but feeling great after the longest, best night ever. Dyan had to leave before the rest of us because of early-morning classes. Amanda went home to two kids and a house to pack up because she was moving to Washington in two days. Heather had to take care of her little boy all day while her husband went to work. I went home and crashed for five hours while my mom took care of Bennett. Like I said, slacker mom.

Tuesday, Bennett and I went with my mom to Lone Pine Nursery to pick out some flowers for their front garden. Actually, my mom picked out flowers for their front garden. I spent the entire time chasing Bennett away from delicate flower pots and dangerous gardening tools. Their yard looks great now though, so kudos to mom.

Bennett (in his swimming suit?) and Grandma, pushing the wagon.

My dad still goes to work everyday, so he would leave when Bennett was eating breakfast and get back in time to watch him eat dinner and say goodnight (Bennett goes to bed at 6:30...he is an excellent sleeper, like his mom). My dad tried coming home for lunch a few times to maybe get to see him that way, but it just happened to be over Bennett's nap. Poor Grandpa.

Wednesday he had had enough though, so he came home at some random time just to be with Bennett. While he was home this huge rain and hail storm blew through, and what started out as "Let's go look at the rain from the warm, safe garage," turned into, "Let's go out in the freezing cold rain, fully dressed and without any protection from the pounding hail." Needless to say, both Bennett and my dad loved it.

Bennett and Grandpa, fully dressed in suit and tie, out in the rain.

Bennett got a steaming hot bath, a warm lunch, and a good long nap after this. My dad went back to work for the rest of the day. Poor, poor Grandpa. We sure love you! (Notice the lovely flowers in the background?)

Random story. One of my callings right now is the Activity Day Leader of the 8-11 year old girls in our ward. An awkward time of life, to say the least. Anyway, a few weeks ago I was waiting with the girls after an activity for their parents to come pick them up, and I suggested we play Mission Dot-Dot to pass the time. Those girls looked at me like I was crazy (which happens a lot, I should be used to it), and said they had no idea what I was talking about. What?! I tried teaching it to them, but they didn't get it and gave up after awhile.

Well, ever since then I have been dying to play Mission Dot-Dot, but since I am an adult now I think my neighbors would be a little creeped if they looked out their windows and saw me hiding in their bushes. I would probably get the police called on me...or shot. Anyway, people just don't understand night games down here, and I was having serious with drawls.

So when I came to Rexburg one of the first things I did was institute a night game night. We actually had a pretty good turn-out and it was super fun, although I did realize that I am not as good at jumping over fences or diving under cars as I used to be.

The losers who got out during Mission Dot-Dot...yes, I was one of them. Every time. Man, I'm rusty.

Afterward we all went in the house and had hot chocolate and brownies, and we played Speed Scrabble, where I also lost every time. No surprise there, though.

The last round of speed scrabble we made one giant crossword out of all our personal crosswords. It took us forever, and we were all very proud of it, as you can tell.

I'm not really sure why this picture is in here, but this is Kate and Colby, who have to be the cutest guys ever. I'm so happy I finally got to meet Kate, she is awesome. :)

Another random story. When Matt and I were just newly married in our little apartment, he would be gone one weekend a month for Drill (Army stuff). I was fine with it, but got a little lonely at times.

One day we had to go to a veterinarian clinic where one of our friends worked to pick something up from her, and while we were there she told us they just had the cutest little Siamese kittens dropped off that had been abandoned by their mother. She took us in the back to look at them and they were precious! They were these teeny, tiny, pure white kittens with sky-blue eyes and just the tips of their tails and paws a light grey color.

Matt said we should get one. I said no. He said it would be good company for me when he was gone. I stood my ground. And then the smallest kitten out of all of them crawled into my lap and curled into a little minuscule ball and purred herself to sleep.

We named her Ink on the ride back to our apartment.

Our apartment, by the way, had a very strict NO ANIMALS rule, punishable by eviction. Which is why every time one of our neighbors came over, we had to (literally) throw poor Ink into the back bathroom. This is also why, to this day, Ink is the most skittish animal on the face of this earth. I think we broke her brain.

But time goes on, as we know it does. So when Matt graduated and we found out we were going to be stationed in Texas, we decided to live with his parents until we made it into our home. And Ink had to stay behind. Because she was an inside cat who was not going to be allowed inside at Mary and Wayne's, and would most likely be eaten before too long if we tossed her into the cold, hard world of ranch-living.

But my wonderful, loving, patient parents graciously stepped in, having lost their only two pets just weeks before to old age, and said Ink could stay with them. So now we get to see her whenever we visit, which is fabulous. But instead of seeing my tiny baby kitten, all white and grey-tipped, we see this...

Whoa. My Inker-Pie. Even as the humongous blackish beast she is, I still love this kitty. And so does Bennett...which is why it is remarkable I even got a picture of her, as she spent the majority of our visit cowering under various beds. Random story over.

Thursday morning Courtney had the day off from work, so she volunteered to stay home and watch Bennett while my mom and dad and I all went to the temple. We had to wait for my dad to get out of a meeting before we could leave though, so even though the temple is only a five minute drive from my parent's house, we got there a little too late to do a full session.

We decided to do sealings instead, and it was a great decision. Being there with my mom and dad was really cool. I love the feeling you get when you know what you are doing is right.

Friday morning we spent packing, and that afternoon we picked up Madison (my cousin) from her apartment and headed to Utah to see her boyfriend Tom. OK, we weren't all going to see Tom per say, but in a way we were, because he is working at California Pizza Kitchen and it was their opening night so we were invited to "test the menu"...which means free food. And wherever there is free food, you know I will be there.

Unfortunately, we got a little later start than planned, due to some forgotten items and a squabble over bananas (don't ask). But don't worry--because I know you were worried--I took over the steering wheel and got us to Utah in record time. I only heard a few gasps of alarm from my mom while we were weaving in and out of traffic, and there were limited complaints of car-sickness from the back. I am my own hero.

The point is, we made it on time and the pizza was worth it! Very fancy-schmancy food.

This is Courtney's pizza. It had artichoke hearts and sun-dried tomatoes and who even knows what else on it. I thought it was very good...although mine was better. Sorry Court :)

Bennett's food was all free too, so I ordered him something from an actual menu for the first time in his life. Of course, the one time I do this was also the one time he refused to eat what was in front of him. Silly boy. Apparently he ate something though, judging by the picture.

Saturday we spent the day at Bennett's Grandma and Grandpa Great's house (my Grandma and Grandpa Hazard) and got to see a lot of Jill and Lee's family too (my aunt and uncle) because they live right down the street from each other. It was really fun to finally get to see my Grandma and Grandpa's new home in Utah. It is beautiful! As soon as I walked in I thought, "Well of course this is where they live, they belong here!" I am so happy they found a place that is so perfect for them...even if it isn't by us in Texas. :)

My Grandma and Grandpa's new home in Utah. We can't wait to have another excuse to visit again soon.

In the morning, a couple of us went to the tennis courts to get in a few games before it go too hot. For those of you who don't know, I was on the tennis team in high school and even got myself to state a few times. Of course, nothing happened past that point, but hey, getting there is an accomplishment in itself, right?

Courtney was also on the tennis team in high school and she went to state, too. She still plays on a league now that she is in college, and she does really well. I got to go to a few of her matches while I was visiting, and I liked watching her win against ladies that were twice her age--not that it would have mattered how old or young they were. Honestly, Court is much better than me and could probably waste me without even breaking a sweat. Which may explain why we never played while we were together. I can't handle that kind of humiliation...

My dad played tennis while we were here, too, which was kind of a big deal. If you will recall, he did something to his shoulder skiing this winter (dislocated it?) and had to have some pretty major surgery done on it. This was the first time he had attempted to do anything like this since then, and he said it felt great afterward. Hooray for dad and Dr. Mills!

I played a little game of doubles on this day, too. It was Krystalee The Beast on my team, versus Colbitron and Karate Kate. It was close, but Krystalee and I pulled it out at the end. Go team, go!

Over the years, my mom has perfected the art of viewing tennis matches. She is now passing that valuable skill on to Bennett. Notice their intense concentration on the game. Very impressive.

Once it got to hot outside, we headed over to Jill and Lee's house to take a dip in the pool. I cannot even begin to describe to you the amount of pictures that were taken of this activity, so here are just a few of my favorites.

Bennett and Grandma Great at the pool
(Notice me in the background, doing nothing again? Slacker mom.)

Grandpa Great, soaking up the sun.

Grandpa, showing off his enormous muscles for Bennett. Sadly, Bennett was to distracted by my cousins' dog to notice. Sorry, Dad. Rejection hurts.

Me and my mom. I love this picture.

Allison, with her perfect face that was carved by the angels. She got all the good nose genes in the family. I think she's gorgeous.

Courtney and Krystalee in their matching swimsuits. This came in very handy when we did our synchronized swimming routine. (You laugh, but I'm being serious.)

Sunday was Father's Day, and I was so excited to have the opportunity to actually be with my dad on this day! I had the best present for him and everything, I worked on it all morning one day. It was a button--like the big kind you pin on your shirt?--and it had this ridiculously funny picture of his face on it, and it said, "Today is MY day." I ordered it online and I was going to give it to him and make him wear it all day long. It was going to be great...and then I left it in Rexburg. So Father's Day came and I had to hurry and recreate it with crayons and a little piece of orange construction paper. Of course, my dad still did wear it all day. To church and everything. And that is probably one of my favorite reasons why I love my dad. He is just so cool like that.

My dad and my grandpa on Father's Day. I sure love these guys!

One of the earliest memories I have of my Grandpa Hazard is of me sitting on his lap in their house in California and he is bouncing me up and down on his knee and singing this little song/rhyme that goes something like, "Oh she's a good girl, she's a pretty good girl, and I never saw another girl like her! Hehe! Oh, look at that girl! Look at her! Look at her! What a good girl!..." I loved that then, but I love it even more now. Because that is exactly what he is singing/saying to Bennett in this picture (replace "girl" with "guy"). It just makes me smile.

Grandma Great, Bennett, and Grandpa Great.

We only spent Sunday morning and night at my Grandma and Grandpa's house. The rest of the day we were in Provo, visiting my Grandma Hill. She has had a lot of health issues the last couple of years, but don't let her fool you because she is sharp as ever at Boggle and she will Take. You. Down.

Grandma Hill and Bennett. This picture isn't very good, but we could only take one because Bennett was literally crushing Grandma's legs. Is it horrible that I think that is hilarious? Don't judge me! We love Grandma Hill, and are so happy we got the chance to visit her while we were here.

My mom, Me, and Bennett. I put this picture in here because it is scary how much we look alike lately. People always told me growing up that I looked like my mom, but the older I get the more true it is. I am so lucky!

Four generational picture. Pretty neat.

Monday I spent at the store, working hard to get rid of all the money Matt is working so hard to get. I bought a lot of really cute new things though, and I have started to accessorize. Yes, you heard me right. I now have a goal to wear at least a pair of earrings with each outfit, if not a necklace or something else along those lines. This is really new and kind of difficult for me, so wish me luck. Motherhood will not get the best of me! Awww, who am I kidding? I was like this way before Bennett came along. This will be interesting.

Bennett, however, was not such a fan of the shopping-over-lunch-and-nap-time idea, so he decided to voice his opinion by throwing his first ever tantrum(s) in public. It was great. It was twice as great because I had absolutely nothing with me to pacify him. Luckily, my grandma allowed me to continue my slacker mom routine, and she took him home while I continued my shopping undisturbed. What am I going to do now that I actually have to take responsibility for my kid?

Tuesday Bennett and I flew home, so we packed our bags and said our good-byes. But before we left we got in one last dose of family fun. We started by following Grandpa Great to the garage, where he pulled out an ancient looking trunk that was full of awesome stuff from his military years. Old uniforms, pins, hats, canteens, and a brag stick (is that what you called it, Grandpa?). It was way cool to see this stuff, especially now that I know what most of it is used for, thanks to my new career as Army Wife Extraordinaire.

This is the trunk of wonders my Grandpa showed me. It was so neat, but what impressed me most was that it all fit in just one box. I think we have about seven of these things in our attic right now, and they are all jam packed with stuff Matt never even uses. One day maybe we'll be cool and downsize like Grandpa.

My Grandpa in one of his old Marine hats and the shirt my dad gave him for Father's Day. Looking at this picture, you can almost picture him in his glory days.

Before we left the house, Bennett and I said our good-byes to Grandpa Great and the boy cousins. Then we, and all the girls in the family, got in the car and drove to American Fork where my cousin, Kaitlin, was waiting to show us her wedding dress. Kait is getting married September 4th in the Draper, Utah temple, but our family probably won't get to be there because that is right around the same time Matt is deploying for Iraq. I wanted to see her dress and decorations really bad though, so at least I could better imagine what I was missing out on. Hence the trip to see the dress.

When we got to the store Kaitlin came out in one of the coolest dresses I have ever seen. It is very "Kaitlin." In this picture it is still unaltered and her hair is not done, so the finished product will be even better. I am so happy for her!

Oh, so pretty! In fact, watching Kaitlin modeling her beautiful dress got the rest of us into the dress-shopping mood. We must have hit the store on a really slow day, because the girl working said we could go ahead and try on whatever we wanted. It was so fun! I kept looking and looking for something I would never wear in real life, but ended up not really trying on anything worth mentioning. Krystalee and Courtney, however...

Wha-bam! Bridal beauty, at the peak of its perfection. Don't be surprised if you see these two on the cover of Vogue one day.

From their we ate lunch at a really good sandwich shop, and then raced to the airport in Salt Lake City to make our 2:15pm flight. Which was eventful, to say the least. Actually, the flight from Utah to Denver Colorado was fine. We even made it in one piece after a very rough and scary landing. But then we had a four hour layover before our next flight home, and for about two hours of it I attempted to entertain Bennett by going up and down the escalators approximately 17 times. When the security guard came over to tell us strollers were forbidden on the escalators (way to catch that one, guys. I'd only been doing it for 45 minutes before you stopped us) we switched over to those walking sidewalks for a good half hour. Soon those couldn't even hold Bennett's interest though, and with two hours left before our flight, I was getting desperate.

And then I saw a sign for the USO.

For as long as I've known Matt he has been trying to convince me that the Army is the best job in the World. This is probably because he honestly feels that way, and he really wants me to appreciate it as much as he does. And the more I learn about the Army and the life that goes with it, the more I have to agree with Matt. The Army definitely takes care of its own. Like the United Serviceman's Organization, for example.

As far as I know, this is an organization which exists purely to make the life of servicemen and their families more comfortable. I have never used anything from them before this trip, but all of that has changed now. The USO is my new best friend.

On the top floor of the airport, right next to the Admirals Club, there is a room for military ID holders only. Walking into it there is a huge lobby with a marble desk that you would see at a five star hotel, and just beyond that is where all of your wildest travel dreams come true. this place had a library, several big screen TVs with giant comfy couches in front, guitar hero, a snack bar where all the food was free, computers with Internet, a "Stock Station" of shampoos, lotions, and toothpaste, and best of all, a play place for Bennett to go crazy in, complete with free toys to take with you when you left. It was Heaven.

For the next two hours we ate, played, relaxed, and got to know some pretty cool people traveling on their way to exciting destinations, such as Rigby, Idaho. Seriously, I think I will start scheduling layovers on purpose from now on. It was great.

By the time we got on our flight home, however, Bennett had gone almost thirteen hours with only limited naps. Not good for this boy. Not good for the entire plane. He calmed down half way through the two hour flight, and fell asleep literally as the plane touched down in San Antonio. He slept the whole way off the plane, into his stroller, past the baggage claim, through a diaper change, into his car seat, and back to Mary and Wayne's house without budging. He was exhausted. I was exhausted. Poor Sarah, who had come to pick us up at midnight was exhausted.

We slept that night, woke up early, and drove home to Copperas Cove, where we took showers and naps and started our new, fun week of unpacking and reconstructing our yard after some long, hot weeks away.

So now we are home. Hooray! And I can finally stop writing this post! Double hooray! But it was amazingly fun while it lasted, as you can tell.

Oh, and don't worry...

I didn't forget my purse this time. :)