Haley's Birth Story

Hello to the Hargrave reading audience! This is Haley's mom, Nancy, and I am pirating her blog for a minute because today, November 28th, is a very special day! Twenty-four years ago on this very day our Haley Dear came into our lives and it has never been the same since! On the kids' birthdays we always told them the story of when they were born, and I know Haley is keeping up the tradition in her family because I remember reading Bennett's story on this blog when it was his birthday. I thought it would be fun for Haley to have her birth story written out for her so she can have it forever. So here goes, and I must warn you that I can be wordy so this could be long. Haley must get her amazing writing ability from me! :)

First, we need some background information. In 1986, when Haley was born, we were living in Merced, California. We had two boys: Logan, who was 4, and Griffin, who was about three weeks shy of turning 2. Haley's dad taught high school science and I was a stay-at-home mom (that was a whole other life for me!). Another important thing to know here is what was going on in our extended families. My dad was just months away from losing his 7 year battle with cancer and he and my mother lived an hour away in Fresno, so we saw them pretty often. Haley's Hazard grandparents lived 2 1/2 hours away in San Jose. At this time they had only had 5 grandchildren, all of whom were boys. We saw them a lot too. It was so fun living close to both sets of grandparents. Now that we are grandparents ourselves I realize even more how precious that must've been for our parents. I would love to live closer to our grandkids! But I digress... .

So, we had two boys and another one on the way that was due on Nov.23rd. I was in the Primary presidency and I was in charge of the sacrament meeting program that was to be performed on my due date. Since both boys had come early I just assumed that this baby would too and I arranged to have others take over my duties for the program, grateful that I wouldn't have to worry about it. It was pretty embarrassing, not to mention depressing, when I not only showed up that Sunday, but was still around the next day, and the next, and the next for five days! So many friends called the hospital inquiring about me that the front desk knew me before I even got there. Thanksgiving was quickly approaching and family was coming. I didn't want to miss out on all the fun by being in the hospital. I could not believe that this baby was putting me through all this anxiety! When it was 2 days before Thanksgiving and I was still waddling around I finally just got philosophical and decided that the baby could just wait till everyone left. I relaxed and we enjoyed a great Thanksgiving Day. Greg's parents came and we all went to his brother's house, who also lived in Merced, for a delicious dinner. I was huge and had been experiencing lots of pregnancy related aches and pains, but that day I felt so good. We all walked to a nearby park after dinner and I was so happy. It was November 27th.

That night Greg's parents were going to stay at their other son's house, but at the last minute decided to stay with us. We talked for awhile and then went to bed around 11:00. Just as I was drifting off I suddenly felt a POP and realized that my water had broken! That had never happened to me before and I wasn't sure what to do. My other labors took 12-14 hours and never really got going until the doctor would finally break my water, and now here I was all ready at that point. I was feeling great, but we decided we'd better get to the hospital anyway. We told Greg's parents what was going on and took off.

Merced isn't a very big town and we checked into the hospital around 11:30. As we were walking across the parking lot I had my first labor pain and more followed as we made our way up to the birthing room. They checked me and found out that I was already to a 5! A 5! This was so different from my other labors that took forever just to get from a 3 to a 4, then finally a 5, etc. The pain started getting really intense really fast, though. There were no epidurals in those days, at least not in Merced. They were still relatively new. So anyway, I felt every pain from start to finish. The next time I got checked I was at a 6, then a 7. My contractions would start at the peak exactly 4 minutes apart and then last 60-70 seconds. In between big ones I'd have milder ones that lasted 30-40 seconds. You women out that have epidurals have no idea what real childbirth is! As I read about this labor in my journal it all comes back to me and I find it amazing that we went on to have 2 more children after this! The doctor came in and told me to start pushing and I couldn't believe it was time all ready. It had all gone so fast! I pushed and pushed and pushed, but got nowhere. I finally had a great big episiotomy all the way though, and 2 more pushes later we could see the back of a dark little head and heard crying. Another push and a little blue body came out. The doctors and nurses were all saying, "It's a girl!" This was news to us because, even though I'd had sonograms with every baby, they could never tell the gender. I couldn't believe I'd had a girl! We were so excited. It was 2:45 a.m., only 3 hours and 15 minutes of labor! That was the fastest delivery I had for any of our 5 children. She had made me wait an extra 5 days, but she made up for it in the end. We named her Haley Dawn. Haley, because we'd picked that name out for our first girl when we got married, and Dawn for her grandpas, who both just happened to be named Don.

While we were thrilled at Haley's birth, she was not! She was born crying and it escalated until it was a full scream. The doctor was trying to talk to us, but we couldn't hear anything. I finally started to feed her and she ate like there was no tomorrow! She had big red blotches on her forehead, on her left eyelid, and another one on the nape of her neck. The doctor assured us that these would eventually tone down, and they did. They took her away to clean her up and when she came back, all pink and bundled, we learned that she weighed 8 lbs. 6 oz. and was 20 1/2 inches long. She was so cute with big dark eyes and chubby cheeks, and when they swaddled her she looked like a little Eskimo baby. My sweet sister-in-law brought us a little purple outfit for Haley to come home in and I just couldn't believe that we were entering the world of pinks and purples. It felt like I was just pretending every time I said, "she", or "her". Grandpa and Grandma Hazard came to see us in the hospital and Grandpa could hardly take his eyes off of Haley. He had always wanted a granddaughter and now he finally had one. Before they left he came over and kissed me on the cheek and said, "Thank you!"

When we took Haley home the boys loved her and were so cute with her. Griffin couldn't walk past her without smothering her with kisses and by the time he was done she'd be all wet. Logan called her, "My Haley" and was so careful when he held her. I remember one time when I had her asleep on my bed and I went in to check on her. She had on a little pink sleeper and she just looked pink all over. I suddenly felt this overwhelming love for her and such gratitude to have her in our family. When my dad died 5 months later Haley and I went down and stayed with my mom for a week. It was such a blessing to have a sweet baby there to distract us and remind us that life does go on. Grandma Hill still cries remembering the comfort Haley gave to her (but, are you surprised?).

So, that is Haley's birth story, and my gift to her today. It seems impossible that it was 24 years ago, but time flies when you're having fun and Haley has certainly brought joy to our lives. Happy birthday, Hay. On this very special day I hope you know how very loved you are!

It's hard to tell what Haley looked like in these pictures. I was so glad to finally have her here!

Notice how dark my hair is! It got darker and darker with every baby until I finally turned myself into a blonde again.

Happy Greg with his first little girl. He looks like he's about 18, but he had turned 29 the week before she was born.

I love this picture of us! This is the first house we ever owned and we moved into it 2 months before Haley was born. Look how cute those little boys are. What a happy time!

Thanks for hanging in there with me for this looong story!

Happy Birthday, Haley! We love you!