348 Days

September 18th, 2010 -- August 31st, 2011.
348 days.

This deployment was one of the best things that has ever happened to us--that has ever happened to me. I feel so blessed for the opportunities I have had for the last year. To get to pay off so much debt (just our house and car left!) and build up a very sizable savings account. To be forced to "grow up" and deal with real life. To get to be selfish--my time, my schedule, my friends, my choices. For Matt to get to be promoted quickly and become proficient in his job in a very focused field. To get to know so many wonderful people. To get to know Matt better, because when all you can do is talk on a computer, you learn a lot about the other person. To get to know myself better, and focus on the relationship I have with my Heavenly Father. To get to know me. I like me. :)

Yes, there were hard times. Like the entire month of May. That was my wall. That was my turning point, where I decided that if there was nobody there but me to get myself and Bennett back on track, then I had better get up and do it. It was hard. It was good.

Matt has told me some things about what he did. About what he saw. And it was hard, but it was good.

So when I found myself standing on the homecoming field with our little boy on August 31st, at 10:00 in the morning, it was a little surreal. To be watching as a string of buses unloaded their passengers. To be crying as they walked toward us. To be grateful, so grateful, as we bowed our heads in prayer for those who were returning home, and for those who weren't. To be pushing through a crowd of people, looking, looking, looking. And then there he was. Just like he had never left. And when we finally embraced for the first time in 348 days, all we could say was, "Hi."

50 weeks
1 wedding
14 major breakdowns
2 extended trips to Rexburg
9 major holidays
3 major birthdays
over $40,000 of debt paid off (!!!)
3 rooms redecorated
1 anniversary
1 funeral
28 weekends spent doing yards
140 walks with friends at night
1 promotion
24 paydays (and 24 bill days)
348 nights alone
countless moments of both sadness and joy

For the last year I have left an old pair of Matt's shoes sitting in the entry hall. I don't really know why. Maybe because I needed a daily reminder that he really was going to come home one day to fill them again. Yesterday I watched as Matt put those old shoes on and walked around the house "tinkering." Bennett was at his side, holding his hand and talking away about the bumble bees. Best buddies.

And I am happy.
So happy.
348 days.

We did it :)